The story of a Pennsylvania Ass

Camp Hill letter-writer extraordinaire Bill McIntyre has penned a gem to Gov. Ed Rendell. Read it below and be prepared to laugh your ass off.

August 18, 2009
To: Gov. Edward Rendell
governor@state.pa.us
Subject: An Ass

Dear Gov. Rendell,

First, congratulations on your diet and the loss of 40 pounds! That's quite an accomplishment! It's remarkable what will power can do. Now if only we could get your budget proposal on the same diet.

The following story has a moral: A man and his son were leading an ass to town to sell him. Soon they passed a group of girls who cried out – "Look! Did you ever see such fools; they have a donkey to ride and they're leading him." So the father put his son on the ass and proceeded on their way.

Soon they passed a group on men talking. "There," said one, "“that proves exactly what I was saying. No one pays attention to old age these days. Look at that young man riding while his poor old father walks." The father stopped the ass and told his son to dismount so he could take his place on the ass.

A little further down the road they passed a group of women and children. "Shame on you," they cried out. "How can you ride when your son can hardly keep pace with you?" The good father wanting to please, told his son to get up behind him.

Just as they were entering the town, a citizen cried out; "I have a good mind to report you to the animal society for overloading that poor beast!" "You should be carrying that ass instead of him carrying the two of you!"

The father and son dismounted and tied the donkey's legs together, and with a pole across their shoulders, carried the ass into town.

Just as they were crossing a bridge over the river, a group of townsfolk started laughing at them. This frightened the ass who struggled to free himself. In doing so, the ass slipped off the pole, falling into the river below and drowned.

The moral of this story is: If you try to please everyone; you'll wind up losing your ass!

Your budget attempts to please everyone; except the citizens who must pay for it. There isn't an agency in this state that cannot exist on last year's allocations or up to a 5% reduction. That includes education. Day 49 without a budget!

Pennsylvania's citizens have learned to do with less in these troubling times; state agencies must do the same, education included. We're simply maxed out and taxed out! Our wallets are 40 pounds thinner!

A poor old,
Bill McIntyre
Who lost his ass in the marketplace!

CC: Executive, Legislative & Judicial Branches of PA Government
Friends of Responsible Government