I’ve come to the conclusion that everything that goes wrong in the world can be traced back to the Democrats. Here’s proof:
Choking on bus fumes
Every time I see an empty bus driving around town — and I see at least one every day — I want to smack Gov. Ed Rendell for diverting $900 million of Pennsylvania’s tax dollars into his favorite lost cause: Bailing out mass transit in Philadelphia and Pittsburgh. This money was supposed to go into fixing Pennsylvania’s highways and bridges, but Rendell decided to use the money to buy votes in our twin basket-case cities at opposite ends of the state. We have to keep those unions happy (and voting for Democrats). I don’t hear the liberal outcries about wasted energy resources when empty buses are riding around our cities, guzzling up gasoline. No wonder we need to drill for oil in Alaska. We have to make up for the gas these buses waste. Don’t forget that Rendell is up for reelection in 2006.
Liberal hypocrisy, you say?
Remember when the Clintons were in power and their masculine attorney general, Janet Reno, defied the courts and sent her stormtroopers on a midnight raid into a private home in Florida to seize Elian Gonzalez, the little boy who escaped Fidel Castro’s island prison? The liberals danced in the streets at the prospect of returning the boy to the clutches of the Cuban dictator. Imagine what would have happened if Gov. Jeb Bush or President George Bush sent armed officers to save Terry Sciavo. California and Massachusetts would have seceded from the union and declared war. The TV networks and their left-leaning newspaper cousins would have called for lynching both Bush brothers if they had pulled a Clinton move. That’s just one of the many examples of liberal hypocrisy in American society.
Reality bites for Democrats
The story didn’t get the kind of play it deserved, with many major newspapers burying it on inside pages when they’ve been running liberal propaganda about Social Security on their front pages for months. The headlines should have screamed: "Social Security to go broke in 2017." That’s just 12 short years from now. Turns out President Bush was right. Social Security needs to be addressed sooner, rather than later. And it appears that the Democrats got caught in another lie. Shame on you, Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi. You’ve been telling us there’s nothing to worry about and we should go about our routines so we wouldn’t notice that Democrats in Congress have driven the Social Security Trust Fund into the poor house. Social Security will begin paying out more in benefits than it receives in taxes in 2017. That announcement didn’t come from the White House. It came from the trustees of the Social Security Administration. They’re the people who run the program. "The numbers leave nothing to doubt about the financial condition of the Social Security system," Treasury Secretary John Snow, chairman of the six-member trustees’ board, told the Associated Press. "The report underscores the fact that we need to do something." Despite the cold hard facts, Sen. Harry "The Ostrich" Reid, the leader of the Democrats in the Senate, stuck his head out of the ground long enough to proclaim: "Today’s report confirms that the so-called Social Security crisis exists in only one place: the minds of Republicans." Sure, Harry, keep saying that and you’ll be minority leader for a long time.
Sen. Byrd-brain is running again
With the likes of Ted Kennedy and Barbara Boxer, it’s tough to settle on one person for the distinction of being the biggest embarrassment in the United States Senate, but my money is on Sen. Robert Byrd, the former Ku Klux Klan member who has been representing West Virginia since 1958. The 87-year-old former Klansman, who has trouble telling what day of the week it is most of the time, is running for re-election in 2006. Already, the left-wing propaganda machines like MoveOn.org (affectionately referred to as Moron.org by some) is working hard to keep Byrd in the Senate. These left-wing organizations vilified President Bush because he dared to say that he believes in God, but wouldn’t think of criticizing a Democrat who not only was a member of the KKK, but also served as a recruiter for the organization. Byrd was once quoted as saying the Klan was an "effective force" in "promoting traditional American values." And Democrats wonder why more blacks are switching to the Republican Party?
E-mail Tony Phyrillas at firstname.lastname@example.org